A City Wide State of Mind....

I decided to try an experiment today with human connection. I would try to look people in the eyes more, smile at strangers, simply acknowledge others when they were in my presence. What an interesting experience. For the majority of the day I was looked at like an alien or a crazy person. It rarely ended well. A very small group smiled back or gave a nod of recognition that I was addressing them but for the rest it was just uncomfortable. Looks of, Don't look at me! What do you want? What are you looking at!? Or those men who thought I was hitting on them and then proceeded to stare at me the rest of the subway ride. Of course causing me to disconnect and go into my own world. A smile does not mean I want to sleep with you people!!! And staring at me is not a turn on, it's creepy!!! Anyways, this got me thinking...

Now I don't expect NYC to be Pleasantville where everyone smiles and says "Hello, how's your day?" in a Disney happy kind of way! I don't want that and I know we are all different. I saw this quote in an O magazine I was reading on the train while trying to avoid a creepy starer. "It is not time or opportunity that is to determine intimacy; it is disposition alone. Seven years would be insufficient to make some people acquainted with each other, and seven days are more than enough for others." Now we are not talking intimate relationships here but what I see in this is, we all have different ways of connecting, but why in this city must we be so singular? Why must I be an alien for wanting to acknowledge another human and let them know "Yes I see you!"

Which leads to my next question, Do cities have there own dispositions? I would have to say yes! If I had money to travel I would go city to city and find how people connect and what the cities distinctive qualities are. Find out what defines the disposition of that location. I can say from my experience, connecting with fellow humans is not a priority in NYC. However there is an amazing strength here, power, drive, New Yorkers are fighters. It is a kind of I am in it for me city. I am not putting this down, these are great qualities and this is an amazing place. I get why you must have strength to be here. And when New Yorkers do unite it is powerful. I just wish it didn't take a horrible tragedy to bring this about. After 9/11 we all looked each other in the eyes on the train, we saw humanity sitting across from us, we saw each other. I wish we could have a mix of the strength and that kind of connection.

But back to the dispositions. As much as I love NYC- I dislike it for this lack of connection and I am curious if it is different in other cities. Do they see each other more in Chicago? Do they smile more in Atlanta? Are they happier in Portland? I so wish I could study the personalities of cities. I wish we could travel the country, better yet the world and find that place that matched our own disposition. But here we are! What I can say is NYC doesn't quite match mine and it's time to start exploring. However, I also must remember it's amazing to meet other dispositions and learn from them. I truly am learning from this very strong, very fast, very individual city!

P.s. If you have had another experience here, Please share. Or if you know about other cities please share! Enlighten me on the personalities of far off places or even places just a few hours away! :)